We Don’t Have All the Answers, and That’s OK

Somewhere along the way, we’re given the impression that as adults, we must know the answer to every single question that comes our way. I’ve tried to recall precisely when it was that I realized this expectation, but I am pretty sure the timing correlates with my first client meeting, fresh out of the hopper and within the first few weeks of my first job after college. I was an account coordinator at a high-tech PR firm in Boston, and I thought it was my job to know everything. It’s not that anyone pulled me aside in advance of the meeting and said, “Now you know everything.” It’s that I thought that was the way it was.

I was wrong. 

It turns out, my job was to answer the questions my clients put in front of me.  But not necessarily to know everything. Sound confusing? It took me a while to sort this out, but over time I learned it was OK to say, “I don’t know the answer to that question, but let me research it and get back to you,” or some variation. It sounds simple, right? Well, not exactly.

The first time I said “I don’t know,” in a meeting it felt weird. But afterward, my manager approached me and said it was the right call. The extra time our team took to brainstorm a solution to the client’s challenge helped to turn a sticky situation into a win. The second time I said, “I don’t know,” it was to a reporter who asked a question I couldn’t answer. He was on deadline and I felt pressure to provide some information but wanted to make sure it was accurate. I was able to call him back about an hour later with a solid answer and a great client quote, which wound up on the cover of the business section of the local paper the next morning. Sometimes, saying “I don’t know,” is the best call.

We’re taught that to succeed, we must perform well in the boardroom. Most executives believe they should answer every question fired at them - even if they don’t know the answer. Suddenly, they’re providing weak or misleading answers, or even leading their team down the wrong path. Sometimes, it’s best to take a breath and say, “I don’t know. Let me get back to you shortly with the best answer.” 

In fact, saying “I don’t know” is a sign of strong leadership. “I don’t know” can lead to better collaboration on your team while everyone works together to find the best solution to your problem, and can empower employees to bring forth ideas they might have not otherwise shared. 

No one is perfect. Let’s stop acting like it.